Hey Reader,

How is it already December?!

Part of me is shocked by how fast this year flew by, but another part is exhausted. A lot has happened!

I strive to pay special attention to this time of year because it feels like life is under a magnifying glass right now. The highs are higher, and the lows are lower. The moments with the people you love are much sweeter, and the pain of fresh grief is more intense. Because everything seems more intense, seeing, caring for, and encouraging the people around you has never been more critical.

Did you know that 59% of people in the USA eat all their meals alone? Were you aware that the US Surgeon General declared loneliness the greatest threat to Americans’ health? Just last year, one study indicated that 66% of people reported feeling lonely during the holidays, and 64% of people with mental illness said the holidays made their condition worse.

A Brutal Holiday Season

I know what this feels like, personally. Two years ago, I went through a horrific holiday season. Just before Thanksgiving, I got a well-known virus that knocked me flat. We canceled a visit from my family, and I separated from my family to keep them healthy. I developed some pretty intense pain in my body and ended up at the Emergency Room multiple times over the next few weeks. I slept on the couch for several weeks due to my need to sleep propped up. My anxiety was through the roof!

I didn’t do any normal holiday activities. A team member gave me some difficult news, and I was living in survival mode without regular energy.

Can you see the problems? I was isolated from people. I felt distant from my wife because we weren’t sleeping in the same bed. I didn’t feel myself.

Three Reminders We Need During Those Holiday Seasons

If I had articulated my needs, the following three reminders would have helped me. They may also be helpful to you or someone you love.

First, we need to know God is not distant.

While the nativity scene on the neighborhood display or in the artwork you’ve seen might seem serene and cute, the story is far messier and more beautiful. Jesus likely entered the world in a dirty cave under the rule of a toxic king and an oppressive world power. The Scriptures declare, “The Word became human and made His home among us.”

That year, I had prepared a teaching series for my church leading up to Christmas entitled “God With Us.” I preached the first message, sitting down just hours after being discharged. The message about God’s presence was one I desperately needed as much as anyone in attendance. (You can watch that message here) You may feel alone, but the message of Christmas is that God is moving near you.

Second, we need to know that it is okay to grieve.

I checked on several people last week. This will be the first holiday season without their loved ones. In those moments, I did my best to listen and create space for them to share, but I also did my best to make sure they knew it was okay not to be okay.

I love the international audience this email will reach, so perhaps other countries are better at this than mine. But, Americans struggle with grief. I can see my unnamed grief during that particular holiday season. If you’re grieving this year, I pray you will allow yourself time and space to pay attention to what rises inside of you during this season. (If you need help, I have a resource for you.)

Third, we need to know people haven’t forgotten about us.

So many people feel invisible today. People start to feel invisible due to age (52 for women and 64 for men). People feel invisible in certain seasons (79% of moms feel this way). Feeling invisible can be harder to process during the holidays.

Getting holiday cards with pictures of family and friends, watching people at public events, and scrolling your social media feed - all of these moments can trigger feelings of comparison, insecurity, and invisibility. We need people who help us when those feelings are strong. For instance, I preached the sermon I mentioned above while sitting down. A friend texted me afterward. “Bro, you never sit down to preach! Is everything okay?” People who notice those little things and take action - those people are the best gift of all!

So, when someone comes to mind over the next few weeks, there’s a reason! Make a quick call, send a text or an email, or record a video or audio message for them.

Whether this season is the most wonderful or least wonderful time of the year for you, I hope you’ll consider the reminders I shared here. Please forward this email to someone who needs them, too!

If you need encouragement about God's presence near you, check out my YouVersion profile page. Inspired by the sermon above, I have a plan called “God With Us” that will be released soon. Although it had some technical difficulties when it launched in November, it should be available again soon!

I’m grateful you’re here, especially at this time of year. Next Tuesday, I'll return with part 2 of this holiday email series.

Thanks for reading!

-Scott

P.S. - If a friend forwarded this email, you can sign up to receive this newsletter each Tuesday here.​